Why Is This So Hard?

Why is this so hard?

What is this?

Life.

Life is like learning how to drive a stick.

Life is hard, y’all.

But why?

Why is life hard?

Cause, um, we’re breathing and we’re feelers of all the feelings.

Yeah, I’m going with that.

Oh, my babies – is life popping you in the kisser?!

We’ve all been there.

Matter of fact, I’m there RIGHT NOW.

BOOOOO.

Instead of questioning the difficult, maybe we should simply acknowledge the truth…

Life is hard.

Here’s the thing (there’s always a thing): you either keep getting popped OR you fight back.

As I sit here, at my keyboard typing, all I can think about is how nice it would be to stop for the day and sit outside in the extreme Texas heat, enjoying an ice cold Shiner.

For the uninitiated: Shiner is a Texas beer that, well, can cure what ails ya (screw the puny voodoo power of Vick’s VapoRub!).

But, here I sit, inside, at my desk.

W-H-Y?

Why not give myself a day? Why not have the grace to say: Woman, you deserve a break – you neeeed a break. Take it.

~snort~

As if there’s a day I don’t deserve a break – neeeed a break, asking myself…

Why is life so hard?

…or is it just that my life is so hard on some days?

Am I the one making everything harder than it should be?

Am I the only one standing like a doofus, waiting to be popped in the kisser?

Nahhhh.  Not just me.

Is life is hard for everyone?

Yes.

For every single soul, for one day or another; life is hard for everyone.

My guess is life is popping you in the kisser, too. My guess is you deserve a break – neeeed a break, too.

Shouldn’t we ALL go outside and drink ourselves into a congratulatory self-love (God, I hate that term) cocoon of muted expectations?

~pretendBULLSHITsneeze~

NO.

That is exactly what you should not do.

Fuck. That. Voice.

Life is hard for everyone.

I mean what I say: Fuck. That. Voice.

If you stop, if you give in to the difficult, because you are tired or the voice is sweet-talking you into lazy nonsense, things are gonna get worse, and there ain’t no self-love in that.

You’ll fall behind. You’ll feel like a failure for giving in. You’ll heap more hot dirty coals upon the black mood that already is.

DON’T DO IT.

Instead, sit your ass down (or stand) and tackle your shit.

Is life hard?

Um, what have we been talking about? Yes. Life is hard.

So, what can you do?

How can you make the hard easy (or easier)?

• Fight back.
• Blatantly ignore the hard.
• Get to work.
• Move forward.
• Do whatever it is that needs to get done.

When you’re finished?

Have a list of fun to counteract the hard (choose one – or ALL!):

1. Get that beer.
2. Enjoy an aged Scotch (hold the wussy rocks).
3. Lay in the grass, while the sun fills your soul.
4. Ice cream – a BIG bowl.
5. Cake. All the cake.
6. A large glass of Southern Sweet Tea.
7. High-five the dog or cat or really quiet houseplants.
8. Celebrate the fact that while life was having a go at you, you hit back with action.
9. Tell all how your will was stronger than the punch to your kisser.

Otherwise, you’ll be me today.

Ass in chair, feeling like a loser on this otherwise gorgeous day.

Give me an L! Give me an O! Giver me a S! Give me an E! Give me a R!

What does it spell?

~big squealy pom pom finish here~

PATTI!

Don’t let the hard days win.

I know if I let the feelings wash over me, if I listen to the soothing voice that keeps insisting that I stop, that if I decide to give in, I’ll feel 100% worse and my recovery from this lie of being a loser or that I suck, will take longer.

Instead, I fight back.

This is how I decided to fight back today:

• Life Popped Me in the Kisser Me:  WAAAAAA! I suck. I should call it a day. *whimper and sad eyes here*
• In Your Dreams Me: Nope. Not gonna happen, bitch (yep, I actually trash talk meself like that – you should hear me on a run).
• Life Popped Me in the Kisser Me: But, even if I try to accomplish the unaccomplishable, the results will suck. Cause, as noted and spelled out, I’m a loser.
• Doesn’t Take Shit Me: Tough noogies, woman. Get a cold drink. Get your ass in the chair. START.
• Life Popped Me in the Kisser Me:  Fine. But, it’s not gonna be good. I just want to sit outside with a beer and *think* about how I should proceed, cause you know, planning is important for forward motion. How can I start when I don’t have a plan? I even have a new journal somewhere. Maybe I should look for that first. Oh! I also bought new colored pens. That way, I can organize my thoughts by color. Once I’ve contemplated where I should go and how I should get there – THEN! – then, I can work.
• Don’t Make Me Come Down There Me: OMG, woman. Shut up and START.

So, I did.

Just start.

Now, I’m not saying you have to be so, um, bitchy with yourself, but any tough love variation will work.

The absolute key is you must START.

Just start to make your life better.

Period.

No negotiating.

I’ve lived life long enough to know that to overcome the hard stuff, you need action, not rest.

Rest AFTER you’ve overcome the pop to the kisser.

You’ll be happier. There will be less suffering. And the ice-cold beer ~your carrot here~ will taste like victory.

Life can get bent.

So, to answer the burning question:

Why is this so hard?

Because we let the feelings of hard override the doing.

Screw the feelings.

Punch back.

I’ve never met a punch to the kisser that couldn’t be overcome (and i’ve seen things – ♫ ominous music here ♫ ).

Go.

Start.

Finish.

Beer.

My life’s secrets are easy and effective.

Gotta go.

That Shiner ain’t gonna drink itself.